There will always be toxic people around us, may it be at work, school or even at home. These toxic people have a negative effect on us. They can demean us, cause us stress and generally make us feel miserable. Learning to deal with this toxic people can be a struggle.
We’ve asked some of the most successful people in the world on how they deal with toxic people. This is the advice they gave us.
Recognize Their Feeling but Do Not Join In
Never allow a toxic person’s words or behavior affect your judgement or actions. Recognize their feelings and sympathize with them, but do not take action. Most of the time toxic people tend to have stronger personality and can overpower someone who has a soft spoken personality. Having a strong personality these people will tend to suppress your own and you may succumb to their desires. For example, if a friend is complaining about her family over and over again, yet you find no evidence of these protests. Learn to analyze the situation and do not put fuel to the fire. Tell her something like “I’m sorry you’re dealing with this problem, It seems hard”, Don’t tell her “You’re right, they are bad people. Leave them”.
Don’t Expect Instant Results or Even Change
Often times we have a person that we never give up on. No matter how much they screwed up or how much they hurt us. When you expect change from these people and see no result, you end up disappointed and drained. You’ve given all the advice you can give to him or her, it is now in her/his hands. It is their choice to take your advice or go on the same path. It is not your duty to change them. It is their duty to change for themselves. Let them decide for themselves, whatever the consequence to their decision is. It is for them to deal with.
Set Your Boundaries
People that tend to have toxic personalities like sucking in people into their problems or issues. They will try to consume you until you are dab smack in the middle of their problems. Never allow this to happen. If you are put into this position you are either forced to join their pity parade or required to find a solution to their problems. There is a difference to listening and consoling someone about their problems and having someone drag you into their problems causing you negative emotions or stress. There is nothing wrong in being a good friend, but if you feel like you are being put in a negative position it is best to keep your distance. Create a boundary between being a shoulder to cry on to being a complete doormat.
Do Not Let Other People Affect Your Happiness
Learn to be the master of your own happiness. Do not let other’s opinion or beliefs get in the way of your happiness. Do what it takes to accomplish your goals and pleasure just as long as you are not hurting or stepping on anybody. Remember, people that love you will not care about petty things as long as they see you happy, toxic people will pick on things you do or say to create negativity.
There are toxic people everywhere. These types of people are too entangled in their personal dramas and pessimism that it appears condemnatory and manipulative. They create a black hole filled with negativity that often drags people in. These people are just people. If you let them affect you and make you act in response, then they become toxic. Learning to deal with them and maintaining your sense of self is important to success. Follow these tips on how to deal with negative people and keep a strong will and remain positive.